Christmas Letter, 2021

 

Greg and Dixie Goode

Crescent City, CA

2021 Holidays

 Merry Christmas, Happy Thanksgiving, delightful Birthday, Happy New Year! May you have something to celebrate and someone to love in 2022.

My something to celebrate and someone to love is still the same people. The last couple of years have been filled with their share of problems and worries, but every day has also been filled with people I love. My family and my friends are amazing to me and I think that they make every day Thanksgiving. 

This year all of my grandkids are back to in person in school, or preschool. The youngest in preschool, the middle in Kindergarten and the oldest in Second Grade. Of course the whole, in person or distance learning, to vaccinate or not, to enforce a mask mandate or not, is not just a political issue - but to the kids it is almost a non issue. They just want to feel secure and to have a predictable routine, and to have people around them who are friendly and caring. For them, school is school. They were too young to really remember it any way but how it is. 

Greg and I are still struggling with health issues, but the masking and hand sanitizers and distancing has made it one of the healthiest years ever as far as the bronchitis and ear infections, colds and flu that normally plague the families of school teachers. 

Greg managed to squeeze three surgeries into one insurance year, so hit his maximum out of pocket early with a knee replacement on June 30, a carpal tunnel surgery in early November and the other knee replacement scheduled for Dec. 16th.

The two he has had already were both successful and he is getting around so much better. 

I still don’t have a diagnosis but I do have an appointment with a UCSF motion disorder neurologist. Not until January 10, and this first one via zoom, so I don’t have to drive to San Francisco. That is a very good thing because it can take me ten hours or more, especially now when not moving causes stiffness and PAIN  The general issues I have all seem to circle around Parkinson’s type motion disorders. There is one I think it might be but I haven’t had it diagnosed yet, “Stiff Person Syndrome” which is a boring but descriptive name that makes most people laugh and say, “oh, I have that too.”

I move like the tin man, except when someone touches me, or I’m cold, or I haven’t moved in a long time, like 20 minutes. Then I startle, jump, shake and all my muscles spasm so hard that they injure my hip or my knee or my shoulder. I used to be able to hide the pain if Daisy climbed on my lap, or Greg reached to hand me a cup of coffee and I started to lean forward, but now it’s progressed to these spasms where my face twists, I scream and everything goes rigid and shakes. It feels ridiculous. 

Anyway, there are less and less things I am capable of doing, but the things I can do, I still consider myself blessed with. I have my grown up children and young grandchildren and my crazy partner who has always been my favorite and now I have an enforced abundance of time with my family by virtue of being unable to teach. Though I am depriving my students. I can just see the delight they could take in knowing that if they startled me, or even just approached in plain sight and put a hand on my arm, I’d twitch like a marionette. No snakes or bugs or tacs on my chair, required. 

I’m hoping that my referral to UCSF leads to answers which let me announce I’m doing much better by the next Holiday Letter you receive. I hope you also have a better year in 2022.  I hope we all find health and happiness in the coming year  

Much Love,

Dixie and Greg

Virtually a New Year

Hello, And so here we are, from New Year 2020 to the New Year of the 20-21 school year has been a wild ride that I never would have predicted. I don't think the January me would even believe if she could read a letter describing the last 8 months.

My prediction or "closing" at the end of my New Year Post makes me want to either laugh or cry. 

"2020 looks like more swimming, acrobatics, soccer and basketball with the granddaughter. Praying for peace and health for you and for the world. Remember to look for the good in each day."

I don't have to tell you about the isolation and loss of income that has been the truth world wide under the Covid-19 pandemic. I don't need to think there are any Americans who haven't heard about the divisions between people of various races and political and religious views. It's stressful and heartbreaking to be sure. I love my country and I love our world. There is so much beauty that it makes my heart break to not be able to get into school and share it with my students, and get out of school and be able to share it with my grandkids.

I have three, three wonderful, deserving, grandchildren. One who lives with me so I see her every day, and two I've never seen enough of even pre lockdowns and this year without birthday parties and holiday celebrations I miss them beyond words.

I've also been dying. My Dr.'s haven't come out and said that, but honestly they have never seen anything close to my daily degeneration. I finally get to an appointment and don't look too bad. It takes energy to dress and drive there (often a couple hours drive) and nerves and hopes add adrenalin, and I function better, then get home and pay for it with three days as an invalid.  My brain and my husband's face tell me I'm dying. (every time I need to adjust my body in any position) but I hope I'm wrong. The love and trust in my granddaughters face tells me I need to be around to be her safe place. She has no idea how many times I've shielded her from the ravages of a meth addicted mom, and I don't want her to know. Life is scary enough just hearing the news in the background, as she tries to master learning via zoom. As a first grader, with a wonderful, but older teacher, she and her teacher are learning together and it's hard.

I don't want to complain. I know that living in a rural place, with low covid numbers and empty areas where we can get out snd play means we are among the lucky ones this year. I know that we have an old house but we have one, we have lost income but still have enough to get by, we have each other.

We Have Each Other.

Just Breathe that in.

Sending you love and the reminder that we are not done yet. Hang in there and I will too, even if it tears a couple finger nails loose to maintain the grip.