Virtually a New Year

Hello, And so here we are, from New Year 2020 to the New Year of the 20-21 school year has been a wild ride that I never would have predicted. I don't think the January me would even believe if she could read a letter describing the last 8 months.

My prediction or "closing" at the end of my New Year Post makes me want to either laugh or cry. 

"2020 looks like more swimming, acrobatics, soccer and basketball with the granddaughter. Praying for peace and health for you and for the world. Remember to look for the good in each day."

I don't have to tell you about the isolation and loss of income that has been the truth world wide under the Covid-19 pandemic. I don't need to think there are any Americans who haven't heard about the divisions between people of various races and political and religious views. It's stressful and heartbreaking to be sure. I love my country and I love our world. There is so much beauty that it makes my heart break to not be able to get into school and share it with my students, and get out of school and be able to share it with my grandkids.

I have three, three wonderful, deserving, grandchildren. One who lives with me so I see her every day, and two I've never seen enough of even pre lockdowns and this year without birthday parties and holiday celebrations I miss them beyond words.

I've also been dying. My Dr.'s haven't come out and said that, but honestly they have never seen anything close to my daily degeneration. I finally get to an appointment and don't look too bad. It takes energy to dress and drive there (often a couple hours drive) and nerves and hopes add adrenalin, and I function better, then get home and pay for it with three days as an invalid.  My brain and my husband's face tell me I'm dying. (every time I need to adjust my body in any position) but I hope I'm wrong. The love and trust in my granddaughters face tells me I need to be around to be her safe place. She has no idea how many times I've shielded her from the ravages of a meth addicted mom, and I don't want her to know. Life is scary enough just hearing the news in the background, as she tries to master learning via zoom. As a first grader, with a wonderful, but older teacher, she and her teacher are learning together and it's hard.

I don't want to complain. I know that living in a rural place, with low covid numbers and empty areas where we can get out snd play means we are among the lucky ones this year. I know that we have an old house but we have one, we have lost income but still have enough to get by, we have each other.

We Have Each Other.

Just Breathe that in.

Sending you love and the reminder that we are not done yet. Hang in there and I will too, even if it tears a couple finger nails loose to maintain the grip.