Happy New Year, I finally see 2020

I Hope You Had a Merry Christmas 2019 and We Wish You a Blessed and Happy 2020

Just listen to the sound of that! Happy New Year 2020!

I keep thinking, “now I have finally managed to see 2020, why am I still so grateful for my eyeglasses?” but things look quite as foggy and out of focus as they always have, or at least since I first got glasses back in 4^th grade. I’ve always been near sighted and this is very much how the year seems too. If I look at the distant pictures and news, everything is confusing and unclear, but when I focus on the close to me, every day life, things get clear and beautiful and filled with love.

Greg and I celebrated our 35^th wedding anniversary in May, just 12 days after our only grandson turned 3. Of course that brought a lot of nostalgia and the memories of people who were around when we married, but are gone from this world now. It’s unreal to me that this year our 36^th will equal as long as my Mom and Dad were married before he died. They would have loved my grandbabies and Brett’s. It’s just how my brain has always worked and sometimes it annoys Greg that anniversaries never go unthought of, and days and years since or until something are something I’m always aware of. I didn’t even consciously count it out, but I knew and was sadly aware that Epiphany Day in 2019 was the Day Greg was exactly as old as his oldest sister, April, on the day she died in the Grand Canyon. It feels so eerie to me that now April is younger than all the other 5 siblings. 

I have had trouble with my brain this last year. While the exact diagnosis of what is going on with my health has passed through from possible Fibromyalgia, to Rheumatoid arthritis, to Lupus, to Inclusion Body Myositis, and now the investigation seems to be looking more like Parkinson’s, and that is scary on it’s own, but more so knowing how my mom went through hallucinations and dementia, and a gradual freezing of her muscles in a Lewy Body Dementia which is closely related to Parkinson’s.

I keep finding that I can’t focus for long, I start books but never finish them unless I’m reading them to Daisy. I don’t really write anymore, although I’ve had a book partway finished for about 5 years. I couldn’t get started on this letter for the longest time, and I read very little so even the Christmas cards We received are sitting in a basket, unopened, waiting for me to find the energy to read them. I have been on Facebook and a photo a day project online, plus having two blogs I write, wrote but for quite a while now I mostly read what others post and reshare that if it interests me. Or share the pictures I take without writing much about them. On the photo project I used to write about each picture with several paragraphs and comment on other people’s pictures, but now sometimes I just put up three days photo’s with titles at one go, scroll through the other pictures without commenting and fall asleep in my chair.

We got a new van and the backup camera helps me still be able to drive safely, but sometimes I have to circle a block because I can’t turn my head enough to see the traffic coming from the other direction. And one scary moment, I was driving to pick up Daisy from daycare, like I had done hundreds of times, and there are two long streets in part of the route. Suddenly I knew where I was going, but nothing looked familiar, and I couldn’t tell which of the long streets I was on, so I had to pull over and park until my heart stopped racing and it passed. Then I was fine.

Austin and Trisha’s daughter Trinity turned one in August, and she is so happy, and smiley. It’s a delight to have her around. Gavin at three is wonderful, high energy and curious, and difficult for me to keep up with, but every time he turns to me for a hug I just melt. They have my heart so enamored with their children. I have always loved preschool children, but this grandmother connection is the purest joy.

Greg still likes working at the prison but they just changed his job, so instead of being a classroom teacher, he is going to start being the college co-ordinator. Helping inmates register for classes, getting the materials they need as it comes into the prison, and then verifying that the work is done and returned to the college. He doesn’t even grade it. He thinks it might make for longer feeling days, to not have the actual students but hasn’t begun in that position yet. He is still active in the community Chorale and has the Youth Choir that practices once a week, so the touch of music hasn’t quite left the family. Daisy loves to sing and always gets annoyed at grandpa for not inviting her up on stage at his concerts to sing a solo. At 5 she has to wait until 10 to audition. That doesn’t sit well. I tell her that when he was finally old enough to audition, her Dad didn’t get in the first time he auditioned and had to wait until he was 11.

Daisy started in the same room, with the same kindergarten teacher where both her Dad and Uncle Austin went to kindergarten. She has loved it every moment, but even though I hope I’m wrong, the Del Norte schools look to be heading into their first teacher strike, starting as early as Jan. 15^th 

Frozen 2 in Brookings, OR

Greg had inherited some money from his parents, and decided to use part of it to treat the family to an amusement park filled December. Austin and Trisha wisely chose to pass and maybe come when their two are older, and it was an exhausting trip, even without carrying toddlers and chasing three year olds. We had a great time but We still missed them.

We flew Medford, Oregon to Seattle, WA To John Wayne airport in Santa Ana. Daisy loved the planes and boats on this trip. We spent two days in Legoland and the Legoland hotel was amazingly designed with kids in every step. Enough that Daisy’s favorite part of Legoland was the dance party in the elevator every time you got on. There was even a whoopie cushion printed on the hall carpet that farted if you jumped on it. Also she loved the kid only peephole on the bedroom door and the fact that every night two small bags of legos were locked in the safe in each room, with a scavenger hunt around the motel leading the kids to the combination for the safe.

We did Disneyland for four days, well, I took one day off and stayed in bed in the motel, and Universal Studios for one and flew home on the 22nd but didn’t even get a tree. It felt like we had already done Christmas. Certainly the theme parks had overwhelmed themselves with decorations.

2020 looks like more swimming, acrobatics, soccer and basketball with the granddaughter. Praying for peace and health for you and for the world. Remember to look for the good in each day.

Dixie and Greg